The last 365 days

My best friend died last year, today. I have lost friends to kayaking before; Jeff West, Stephen Forster, just to name a couple. But, I have never lost my best friend. 

Enjoying the Idaho sun. 

It took me a long time to get close to Shannon. For a year, she told her parents she would make me be her friend, she would ask Snowy to tell me to hang out with her. 

Little bug. 

I'm not very good at having female friends. I'm competitive, protective, and I like having all of the attention. I finally gave in. Shannon started coming over to our house, her infectious attitude always made people laugh and smile, we (and Caroline Moon) started going to yoga together a couple of times a week. I remember one class we made Jay Mahan come with us, we giggled the whole session. Always pushing each other over, making farting noises, doing arm balances after class. We were like two peas in a pod. 

On the Bechtals front porch, best swing ever!

 In the spring of 2013, I was asked to go on a Backcountry Babes trip on the Middle Fork of the Salmon with Canyons Rafting out of McCall Idaho. I of course said yes. I was then told I could bring a friend with me. It took me a little, but I decided to ask Shannon to come with. It was the best decision I have ever made, every day since then I smile when I think about how excited she was to go on the trip. I was happy to be able to give her the chance to go. 

The takeout to the Middle Fork of the Salmon.

Shannon taught me a lot in those 2 short weeks in Idaho; an infectious smile gets you anything, find happiness even in the smallest of things, and always look to the future without fear. 

When we got back from Idaho, it was back to the daily grind. I was training really hard for the Freestyle Worlds at the NOC being held in September, I was working, and so was Shannon. We got busy for the next few weeks. She really wanted me to come to the Great Falls Race with her. I was in the midst of having some massive breakthroughs in freestyle so I decided to stay back, I regret that decision every day.

The girl with no belly button lives. 

 I think about if things would have been different if I was at Great Falls, one year ago today. 

Where we belonged, on the river together. 

 She stopped by the house when we were eating dinner one night, my friend Josh Chambers was there. Shannon came bursting into the house, started laughing and smiling and saying that she was off to the Potomac for the weekend. She was so excited. I wish I would have known that was the last time I was going to see her.  

What I woke up to every morning for 2 amazing weeks. 

 On July 11 2013, I woke up at the NOC like another normal day. I paddled in the morning then mid day I was at Slow Joes with Claire O'hara doing a blog post. I got a pretty frantic message from Anna Levesque telling me to call Patricia Beaks and it was about Shannon. My life changed forever in the next few moments. I was told that Shannon was missing and presumed dead. Patricia was asking for Shannons' parents contacts. I only knew they lived in Andrews, NC, right up the road. 

Ah, jet setting. 

I had so many thoughts go through my head. I was alone in a place where I grew up and knew everyone. I just wanted to disappear from the world and pretend it didn't happen. I of course called Snowy, who had already heard the news and he told me to stay at the NOC because I should not be driving. I wanted to go home so bad. I wanted to be held by the man I love and grieve the loss of our friend together. I knew it was a bad idea to drive though. 

Besties for good. 

The next days were a whirlwind. I found Shannons' parents and met them for the first time on July 12. I felt like I already knew them and they already knew me also. I met her twin brother, whom has the same infectious smile, I could not stop staring. Her older brother was like a teddy bear to hold, when he hugged me I felt like everything would be ok. Her family is the most amazing family I have ever met.  

Smallest plane ever!! That poor pilot. 

We rock at fishing. 

Things started coming together, Snowy and I had to fly to DC to get the Dagger van with Shannons things in it, her family was going to fly up for the weekend, it was all a blur though. I told Snowy "If we can make it through this, we can make it through anything." Snowy had lost a friend and collegue. I lost one of the few people who broke through my hard outer shell and saw me for who I was. 

But, not golf. 

 In the month after Shannons death, I was a wreck. But, only on the inside. I kept as busy as I could, I was on a different plane every week, going places, doing things. I never sat still. I cried a lot, but no one saw it. I heard from people with condolences and their thoughts on Shannon.

Shannon was good at everything. :-)

 I lost a part of me that will never come back. As I write this, one year later, I have changed, and grown, a lot. I don't want to run class 5 anymore, I don't want to be scared all of the time. Doing the Grand Prix this year was something I wanted to do to tell myself that it's going to be ok, and I knew that Shannon really wanted me to do it. 

Driving on the golf course. 

Shannon is with me every day, when I am at work, at school, at home, on the river. Losing her made me rethink my priorities a lot. It also has made me love more powerfully. 

Living the dream. 

On that note, CHEERS to Shannon, her infectious smile, hilarious laugh, amazing personality. May we all try to be like Shannon and embody what she wanted this world to be like. Smile at every one today and brighten someones day the way Shannon did every day.

Looking to the future, without fear. 

Shannon was the best thing thats happened to me since I met Snowy. I miss her so much every day. 

Forever together. 

 I am typing this from the information center in Sort, Spain. I am here for the final Freestyle World Cup. I compete in an hour and a half. Today, I compete for Shannon. Today, I find happiness in the small things and I have no fear of the future. Today, I smile at everyone. 

Rest in Peace my best friend.
12/7/1989-7/11/2013

#30daysofhappiness

Day 1: My Birthday Party

Day 1: #30daysofhappiness

The point of this #30daysofhappiness is to remind myself that the life I live is the best I could ever get, no matter what comes up. I am in the midst of 6 full weeks of competition and training very hard. Day 1 started off with my 26th birthday. I was lucky enough to have a huge party at Anne Greer's house and the cherry on the frosting was having my dad with me to celebrate. On day 1, I am happy for my family and friends that I am blessed with every day. 

Day 2: After Birthday Breakfast

Day 2: I was lucky enough to have Haley Mills staying with me in McCall, Idaho and she made me a perfect after birthday breakfast complete with fresh maple syrup from the northeast. I also spent most of the day paddling at the Kelly's Whitewater Park and being with my dad. Day 2, I am happy for the amazing food that we are lucky to have day in and day out. 

Day 3: Salmon Fishing with Dad

Day 3: Dad and I wanted to go fishing on the Main Salmon outside of Riggins for... you guessed it... Salmon. We were up at the crack of dawn (330 am) and drove to Riggens where we met up with Mike Hicks to fish for the day. It was pretty cold and rainy and we didn't catch any fish but any moments that I get to sit next to my dad on a boat are the best moments I will remember forever. Me: "Hey dad, remember that time it was 40 degrees and raining all day on the river and we caught no fish?" Dad: "Yea A, I remember that". Day 3: I am happy for the ability to go fishing with my father and spend the day with him outside. 

Day 4: Hot Tub Homework

Day 4: I woke up early in the morning to do homework but I had pulled my ab two days prior while surfing at kellys. I used the most of the situation and set up my office in the hot tub for the morning. I did heaps of school work (I'm in an Art History class and also taking second level Spanish) and even got health insurance! It was a bit chilly in the morning but by 10:30 my toes looked like sausages, I had been joined by Riley Greer, and the sun was shining. Day 4: I am happy for the ability to be in school and travel at the same time.

Day 5: Freestyle Event

Day 5: We headed to Kelly's Whitewater Park in Cascade Idaho for the beginning of the Payette River Games to start. I started my weekend off with a bang, scoring a 668.66 point ride. It stood to be the highest scoring womens' ride for the weekend. I was so stoked to know that I was able to do something like this, I did every move I know how to do! Day 5: I am happy to find a feature that likes me as much as I like it.

Day 6: Kai Lenny

Day 6: Back to Kelly's Whitewater Park for more competing. I spent the morning doing school work and actually writing a 3 page paper for my Art History class. I spent the afternoon doing the boater cross downriver sprint, I ended up 3rd overall, and the freestyle competition where I made it into finals in 3rd place. I also watched some super sweet surfers rip up the wave at Kellys, including Kai Lenny. If you haven't heard of Kai Lenny, search his name. He is a very well known huge wave surfer and he is super good at SUP also. He is an all around water man including kite boarding and pretty much anything else you can imagine to do on the water. Day 6: I am happy to compete next to people who I watch in the movies!!

Day 7: You Are Beautiful

Day 7: Last day of competition for Kelly's Whitewater Park and this is the day you make the money! I competed terribly and ended up coming home with $900, better than $0 but less than the $5500 I won last year. I didn't advance in the boater cross and could get nothing to come around in the Freestyle. I ended up 5th in freestyle and an unknown number in the boater cross. Not my day. When I got home I was sad and disappointed at my competition abilities. I was also hoping to win some money for the upcoming Europe trip as I don't make any money in the road. I turned my computer on and I saw this photo posted on my First Descents Facebook page. This photo is more than special to me and it came at the perfect time. Day 7: I am happy to meet the people I do through First Descents. 

Day 8: To France!

Day 8: Hopped a flight to France after saying good-bye to my friends and my Daddy. It was a bittersweet take-off. Leaving behind the people I love, to see new places and have new experiences. I am so excited to be heading to France and Spain for the first time ever. A new stamp in my passport and many new stories are to come. Day 8: I am happy to have the ability to fly, in a plane. 

Day 9: Find Love within Yourself

Day 9: I landed in France in the middle of the day on Tuesday. I had a bit of a restless flight but I watched some funny chick flick called "The 5 Year Engagement". It was pretty funny and took my mind off of things. Rowan and I met up with Mathieu Domoulin and he took us to Millau France, where the first World Cup would be held in a just a couple of days. I had this photo sent to me from a woman who I work with at Greenville County, all things happen for a reason. I was very jet-lagged, sore, in a country where I have never been, can't speak french, and I was sad to be away from home. Day 9: I am happy to be so lucky.

Day 10: Getting Smarter

Day 10:  I had a pretty rough training session, it included 3 very bad rides and no good ones. I was pretty broken after that session. I was hoping to be able to get here and crush just like I can at the NOC, I understood that day that my aspiration was not going to happen, at least not in Millau. I went back to the house to finish up a chapter in my Spanish book. I took the chapter test and got a 100%, I am averaging a 97% in the class, even though I have spotty internet, not much time, and I'm in a French speaking country! Day 10: I am happy to be able to further my education by learning a new language to open new doors for me as I grow as a woman.

Day 11: I love Candy

Day 11: I had training at 2 pm, it went a little better than the aforementioned training so that was good. I also competed in the afternoon. I did not compete as well as I had hoped and I was unsure if I was even going to make the cut. If I didn't make the cut, it would have been the first time I havn't made the first cut since Worlds in 2009 in Thun Switzerland. I, luckily, edged my way in ending in 9th place for semi-finals. Day 11: I am happy to have candy to keep my energy up.

Day 12: Wine, Cheese, and Port (and Snowy's parents)

Day 12: This was my second day of competition and I didn't have my hopes up to make finals. I had not gotten the time to train in the feature and it was very flushy, making it hard to stick moves. I ended up in 8th place and didn't make it to finals. I was alright with that though. I spent the rest of the day with my boyfriends parents who so graciously came down from the UK to watch me compete and be with me. It was so nice to have them with me and cheer me on. They treated me to a fancy french meal after the competition that included oysters, chicken, and all sorts of fancy wine and cheese (two of my favorite things ever). Day 12: I am happy to have the most amazing in-laws a girl can ask for. 

Day 13: Ah.... France

Day 13: After doing school work in the morning, I headed to the feature to watch finals. I noticed the sheer beauty of everything that was around me and I immediately felt happy. A perfect stone street, a kebab place, and no one on the street gave me the feeling that I truly was in Europe. There is no place like this in the United States. I have always felt welcomed and never felt like I was in danger or in a sketchy place. I have been to the fresh food street market and gotten many a croissant, even though I can't speak any french, people are always willing to help. Day 13: I am happy for nice people all around the world.

Day 14: Miniature Coffee

Day 14: I had a slow morning and this coffee tasted like heaven when I finally got out of bed. I now find myself halfway through my #30daysofhappiness to raise money and awareness for First Descents. I have raised less than half of my goal. This fundraiser is to remind people to find happiness in whatever the world throws at them and even if you are busy with work, school, kids, stress, what have you, there is always time to look at your day and find your #Happiness. 

"First Descents is an organization that offers young adult cancer fighters and survivors a free outdoor experience designed to empower them to climb, paddle, and surf beyond their diagnosis, defy their cancer, reclaim their lives and connect with others doing the same." These camps are offered all over the United States and they are FREE to the participants. This is why it is so important to do fundraisers for this organization. If you know anyone between the ages of 18 and 49 who has had cancer, or has cancer, empower them to come on this week of life changing experiences. 

Here is the website: https://firstdescents.org/

Here is the link to my fundraising page: http://tfd.firstdescents.org/site/TR/Events/General?px=1001404&pg=personal&fr_id=1040

Please, please, please take a moment out of your busy day to donate to an organization that enlightens people through the outdoors, and think about how much the outdoors had made you happy.

#30daysofhappiness

#outlivingit

Thanks for reading!

Where have I been??!!

In the cloud forest, raining really hard with 50 MPH winds!!

Some people know, after the Green Race I kind of fall off the planet of paddling for a little while. I paddled so much in 2013 training for Worlds and then straight into the Green Race, I was pretty ready for a break!! For the third year in a row my amazing boyfriend and I went to Costa Rica for a month. We traveled up to Managua, Nicaragua for something new to see. The boarder crossing was a bit funny but we made it. 

One of the many volcanoes around Nicaragua

 So, we made it to Costa Rica and my mom and her boyfriend came to visit this year! It was awesome having then with us and we took a few day adventure back to Rincon De La Vieja. We did a mud bath, zip line, 450 meter water slide, and horse back ride in the jungle! Action packed days here. 

Mom and Ken

Mud bath!!

Back on the beach with Tony and Teri 

We primarily stay in Nosara while in Costa Rica. It is an amazing area of the country and the beach is perfect for surfing or just sun bathing. The days there consist of surfing at 5 am, eating breakfast at 8, napping at 10, adult beverage at 12, nap at 2, surf at 4, dinner at 6, bed at 9. Rough days.  

Shannon was with me every day!!

Its always hard for Snowy and I to come home after being there for a month. Snowy came home on the day the polar vortex hit so he was pretty bummed. I, sadly, missed out on the polar vortex and got an extra 2 days in the tropics! But, alas, we all have to come home to reality at some point. 

EW. 

 Well, I started school again this semester. Microbiology and a few other classes. Between class, work, trying to be a housewife, and attempting to stay in shape, I was a bit busy. But, it made the winter go by quickly. As it was everywhere, it was cold and really snowy for the south!!

Saving lives, making a difference. (note the snow, in SC!)

For three months, my life consisted of all things "normal". Work, school, and no play. This also means no kayaking for me, which is a big deal when I compete against people who paddle year round.  

Slaloming and freestyle at the NOC

Thankfully, it started warming up and I got motivated to go paddle again. The NOC was cold but all of my friends were there so we were all stoked to be back together after a long winter apart. I reunited with my 5x5 comrade, Haley Mills and we were happier than clams to be back together.  

US Slalom Team Trials at the USNWC

Last weekend I went to the Charlotte USNWC and competed in the US Slalom Team Trials. I have wanted to compete in this event for a long time and I finally committed to doing it. I had a very good time and I could feel my runs getting better as the weekend went on, faster and faster every day. I ended up 4th overall, one spot out of the team but I am so happy that I went and it only made me stronger!!

As the Whitewater Grand Prix looms over some of our heads, I am trying to get as strong as I can and get some more time in my kayak. All in all, barring the cold slightly long winter, it has been a great one. I am so thankful that it is 80 degrees outside now!!

Its true. 

GoPro Mountain Games 2013

Entering the "Bird Bath"

 As always, the GoPro Mountain Games (formerly the Teva Mountain Games), starts off with a bang at Homestake Creek in Colorado. We are about 30 minutes outside of Vail in a town called Red Cliff and theres a roadside section of river that drops 450 feet per mile. Its an amazing stretch of whitewater and this year it actually had some water in it! My runs didn't go as well as I had hoped and I ended up in 3rd place behind Martina Wegman and Natalie Anderson.

Setting up for something huge!!

My mom and dad were at the Games this year so it was awesome to be able to see both of them for the weekend also. Going into the freestyle I was worried this year because it was a big cut for the females. We were also competing agains the juniors, who are better than most of us!! We cut 50%, from 12 to 6. I (luckily) ended up 6th!! We cut straight to finals for Saturday afternoon so most of Saturday I spent packing for Idaho and making sure I got my hair cut!

Before

 As some of you know, I did a pretty massive fundraiser for First Descents. I wanted to raise awareness of the organization and at the same time do something that people would ask about.  I wanted to be able to give back what I was doing, so I decided to shave all of my hair off.

Check out my page, even though I made my goal, every dollar counts and if you have some change feel free to keep donating to this amazing cause. My page will stay open until the end of the year.

http://teamfd.firstdescents.org/2013/fd/shaveQuickie/

So, I shaved my head at the Games right before my finals run. I felt like I was at least 10 lbs lighter!

After

I then had to compete in finals in a stacked line up. Sage, Haley Mills, Courtney Kerin, Rowan Stuart, Emily Jackson, and myself. I revealed my new hair cut to the crowd and I got a huge, very empowering, cheer from everyone watching. 

Proud of Sage Donnely for having a great ride

 I knew it was going to be tight to get into 5th place, for the money so I had learned how to McNasty the day before the competition, with some help from Dustin Urban. I doubted that I would stick one in this feature, I was watching the men wash out trying them, but I didn't care. I had a relatively good ride and I decided to let it all hang out. I went for it, and stuck my first ever McNasty in competition. 

So stoked on sticking it!

 I didn't care that I ended up 5th place, I had done a move that no other women did in the competition and to me, that was winning. 

Huge huge loop!!!

This spot was also giving out some massive loops, which are my favorite thing to do! Always a fun move to stick.

Cartwheels

 All in all, I was happy with where I ended up in the competition and I was happy that I learned a new move. The GoPro Mountain Games were great this year and I hope to be a part of them for many years to come. 

I also got the chance to meet the owner of Jati Suits, Burton Falk and he hooked Haley Mills and I up as the newest team members/ambassadors!!

http://www.jationepiece.com/

Check out their suits online, they are super warm and so comfy I have been living in mine as of late. 

I also got to spend time with an amazing family during the weekend. My little buddy Campbell and his whole family, known to me as the Arizona Fan Club, this family comes up every year to watch the athletes at the Games. They are an inspiring family and also have an amazing story to tell. If you get a chance check them out on Facebook, Campbells Crew. 

Campbell and I 

A quick huge thanks to everyone who supports my habits!! Thanks for reading. I headed to Idaho the day after the GoPro Games for a big adventure. See what it was coming up next!!!!

Special thanks to the photos: Campbells Crew, my mom, Stephanie Viselli, and Phillip Robert

Burton and my new Jati Suit